This past weekend I was able to go to Oklahoma to visit some very dear friends of mine. I never thought I would have so much fun in such a "blah" state, but it doesn't matter where in the world my friends and I are, I am convinced that we could make it our own party!
Spending time with my friends really means more to me than any other thing on this planet. Especially these girls. They have helped me through so much and have seen me at my worst. I really am blessed to have such thoughtful people in my life who honestly care about who I am and where I want to be. Another bonus to hanging out with these girls is that they are married and I get to see couples interact with each other. I mean lets face it, it has been about a year and a half since I have been in a relationship and I am finally starting to forget what it was like to have that special someone else. Is it tough? Sometimes. But truth is is that some day, I too will have my Prince Charming who will sweep me off of my feet and I will sweep him off of his and we will be magical.
Back tracking a little bit to Valentines Day - I didn't want to go out with anyone or do anything. I felt like I owed it to myself. I had spent so many years of my life with someone else (who I cared for SO deeply and was extremely happy with) and I just honestly felt like it was time for me to spend time with me. I am doing so well with learning how to be truly happy with myself and I knew that Valentines Day (as silly of a holiday as it is) would be a perfect time for me to go on a "date" with myself - in my apartment. With a lovely dinner and a small glass of wine. Oh and Castle. However. Even though I wanted to spend the evening by myself for some quality R&R time...last year I was able to go on a very late night coffee run to a really cute coffee shop here in Houston and I thought that it would be wonderful if we could do it again this year. Last year's outing meant so much to me because it was my first VDay by myself and it lead to one of our infamous quotes "yeah but I'm talking about girls I'm interested in" and I deep down wanted to be able to go out on a very very small, quick and absolutely NO "date" crap date on VDay and knew that he would be the only guy who could fill that position. However, I didn't think it was going to happen this year because he has a lovely girlfriend and it is only fair that he spend this holiday with her. Well that afternoon I got a text from Andrew asking what I were up to for the evening and I told him that I was just going to spend the evening at home on my own and he said that he wasn't planning on picking up Sally till around 7 and that he was leaving work early if I wanted to meet up with him for about 30-45 min at Brazil (the coffee shop we went to last year) and make it a mini tradition. It absolutely meant the world to me that he did that. I mean lets be honest. I am happy being single, yes I really am. However, there are moments, that I wish I had my sidekick to go out with and to whom I could go on various adventures with. I am blessed to have the friends I have who take care of me each and every single day but sometimes even they can't fill that void that is there.
I talked with my dad about it a little bit the other day and I told him that I know that my time with come soon. Being single is a gift. A gift that I wasn't happy with receiving a year and a half ago. A gift that I didn't want to accept but I am glad that I did because it has brought some truly amazing people into my life who wouldn't be here otherwise. It has given me the opportunity to travel and to really learn who I am as a person. It has really shown me my weaknesses and has brought some of my "downfalls" to light in a very ugly way. As hard as it has been, it has been good to me and has shown me what I need to do to make myself who I am and who I want to be. And after all - it is slowly leading me to the man of my dreams :)
"Light up your face with gladness, Hide every trace of sadness.
You'll find that life is still worthwhile, If you just smile."
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